Weeks 16: Long Road to a Dad Joke

Weeks 16: Long Road to a Dad Joke

Recaps

Atletico Morelia 2 – 1 Alebrijes

Alebrijes’ up and down form continued as, Julio Cruz made an impact within 2 minutes of coming on in the second half, but couldn’t get the win.

Ross County 0 – 1 Aberdeen

It’s been rough going for County this year, but that shouldn’t fall on the defense. Alex Iacovitti, Jack Baldwin and Keith Watson have created the strongest back line outside of Glasgow (and the dominant Old Firm). But their attack has been worse than everyone except Kilmarnock). They are 20 goals off of their total last year (and clearly miss Charles Regan Cook)

RB Leipzig 0 – 1 SC Freiburg (F-Cup)

It’s another Cup final for Freiburg, this one coming thanks to a victory over corporate rival RB Leipzig. It was a tense affair going all the way to the sixth minute of stoppage time, when Hasret Kayici (who else) got on the right end of a great volley to net the winner that sends die Frauen to the finals.

Rosenborg BK 1 – 0 Roa (F)

Emilie Joramo scored early for win. That should complete the defensive midfielder’s allotment for the year, but when it nets three points it was clearly well timed.

Minnesota 1 – 2 Orlando (M)

The Loons couldn’t seem to convert on their opportunities, but had great chances. On a normal day Bongokhule Hlongwane’s wild man unleashed style shoulda woulda given the Loons 2 goals. But news is rarely about what coulda happened, and as Orlando actually did get the goals that’s all that counts.

Punjab FC 1 – 0 Sreenidi Deccan (Cup)

Punjab finally got some points in the cup, came against their fellow I-Leaguers, and unfortunately after they were eliminated. It is some consolation for Punjab to get a win in the Super Cup, even if it leaves them finishing bottom of their group, it came against their old rivals in Delhi. If we learned anything from this tournament, it’s that the Warriors have some work to do before the ISL campaign starts up in the fall. (I’m still not sure if coach Staikos Vergetis’ more defensive plan is the way to go to limit opponents, or if the best defense is a good offense)

Werder Bremen 1 – 2 Freiburg (M)

Bremen looked best during the first half but Lucas Holer and Roland Sallai were a great combo returning the benefits to one another to get the win.

Legon Cities 2 – 0 Kotoku Royals

Michael Otou’s brace against bottom of the table Royals was very valuable. (Teams 13-17 are all tied at 31 point, two of the five will be relegated…hopefully not our Royals)

Molde 1 – 1 Rosenborg (M)

Rosenborg’s best period of pressure led to an own goal and the required work for a draw.

Olympique Marseille 1 – 3 Grenoble Foot (F)

A win. On the road. Against a prestige club like Marseille. Wowza, when the ladies of Grenoble come back, they come all the way back! A double for Jade Decilap was instrumental in the result.

Emelec 1 – 2 El Nacional (M)

It remains the Miller Bolanos show in Emelec, as in, why can’t we do anything without Miller Bolanos? The talismanic midfielder’s absence was palpable again, as Los Bombillos had plenty of possession but couldn’t seem to do much with it after Jose Cevallos scored in the early going.

Grenoble 0 – 2 Saint-Etienne (M)

It was a good but not really outstanding effort for Grenoble in the shirt sponsor Derby. But the pictures of the game looked like a lot of fun

Alebrijes 1 – 0 Pumas Tabasco

Julio Caesar Cruz was the man of the night, scoring his sixth of the campaign on what can best be described as a goal by default and keeping Oaxaca in the thick of the mid table tussle.

Asane 0 – 3 Rosenborg (F)

In their second match of the week, the Troll ladies (which is a nickname I will keep using no matter that I’m the only one using it) continued their perfect start to the season. The veterans Cesilie Andreassen and Synne Hansen both scored

News & Notes

Blakstad’s Back in the Ice and Snow

Blog favorite Julie Blakstad‘s time in Manchester has been generally strong. She seems to score at every opportunity, but there are plenty of talents to employ at one of the world’s biggest clubs. So rather than giving her a richly deserved role, Julie has been loaned out to Swedish side BK Häcken. Obviously, we’d have preferred a return to the black and white of Trondheim, but if Julie’s happy, we’re happy.

Player of the Week

With multiple braces we could open an orthodonture clinic (ba-dum CHING!!). But the player who made us smile the most has to be Jade Decilap who has helped Grenoble’s Mesdames get back on track AND boasts far more swag than I do.

Standings

Punjab nearly got back to the top spot on their own skills with their win of Deccan, but if we’ve learned one thing in these last years it’s to NEVER bet against the women of Rosenborg. Meawhile, Emelec’s slide continues, without Miller Bolanos they seeem to be bereft…not unlike my heart

TeamWDLPPGGFAGAA
Rosenborg5112.291.430.29
Punjab12232.242.290.94
Minnesota3221.571.141.00
Grenoble114121.371.001.19
Emelec3041.291.291.43
Freiburg95111.281.121.56
Legon Cities4751.181.061.06
Alebrijes5571.181.411.35
Ross County3380.861.001.14
Vozdovac2270.730.641.82
Montana–b000
Table Updated 4/12/22
b–Team is between seasons

What’s Next

Thursday, April 20th

Emelec v. Huracan (M-South American Cup)

Friday, April 21st

Karela United v. Legon Cities

Saturday, April 22nd

Bayern Munchen v. SC Freiburg (F)

Hearts v. Ross County

Rosenborg BK v. LSK Kvinner (F)

Seattle Sounders v. Minnesota (M)

Sunday, April 23rd

Freiburg v. Schalke 04 (M)

Legon Cities v. Kotoku Royals

Rosenborg v. Sandefjord (M)

Musuc Runa v Emelec (M)

Grenoble Foot v. Clermont Foot (F)

Monday, April 24th

Bordeaux v. Grenoble (M)

Tuesday, April 25t

Detroit City FC v. Minnesota United (M-Cup)

Wednesday, April 26th

Legon Cities v. Accra Lions

Week 12: Breakthroughs

Week 12: Breakthroughs

Recaps

Freiburg 0 – 2 Juventus (M-European Cup)

There is no joy in Freiburg, a collection of globally elite talents from one of the wealthiest clubs in European history beat them handily. Le sigh. At least we gave them a pretty good showing.

Livingston 2 – 1 Ross County

While County might feel duly frustrated that they had the best chances and came out with the worse result. But their shots were far wilder than Livvie’s and even if you have great chances if you don’t hit them toward goal it doesn’t matter. Keith Watson, Jordan White and Eamonn Brophy could all use some target practice.

Cukariki 3 – 1 Vozdovac

Borisav Burmaz’s early penalty gave some hope for a big road win, but Cukariki came back alive to stymie the Dragon’s fire

Sochaux 1 – 0 Grenoble (M)

Vincent Hognon sent out a mostly second choice side and paid the price as the reserve defenders looked overworked, and the reserve attackers couldn’t break through. They nearly held out for a draw but a late Sochaux goal sealed their fate

Emelec 1 – 0 Tecnico Universitario

They had to wait a week but Emelec got another win. And once again the man in the middle of it all was Miller Bolaños, whose penalty made all the difference.

Colorado 1 – 2 Minnesota (M)

Matches against Colorado always involve a surprising degree of drama, but this one was fun. After falling behind early in the second half, Hassani Dotson’s heads up play won a hand ball penalty that got things level. And Miguel Tapias rose up to deliver a terrific deflected header to snatch a late win!

Freiburg 0 – 1 Hoffenheim (F)

Hoffenheim crashed Freiburg’s big party in the Dreamstadion. It was particularly painful to give up the game on a 90th minute goal when the Frauen’s backline had done so much to keep the game even until then. Samantha Steuerwald, Marie Muller and Lisa Karl were excellent, but couldn’t do enough to leave with an overdue victory.

Mainz 1 – 1 Freiburg (M)

Late goals are becoming something of a problem for Freiburg. This time Ritsu Doan’s opener could well have sealed the victory, especially when five minutes of added time in the second half came. But, in a bonus 6th minute Mainz got their equalizer against an admittedly spent backline of Ginter, Gulde and Kubler, and sent Freiburg home unhappy. (A draw on the road is enough to keep them clicking along near the top of the table, but it’s another round of “what could have been).

Legon Cities 2 – 0 Aduana Stars

Be still my beating heart, the Royals won a game! And not just any game: a game against league leading Aduana Stars!! Micheal Otou got the brace, including a penalty kick, and got Legon their first win in 6 tries (and only their third win this year out of 12 tries–including one cup match)

Mineros 3 – 6 Alebrijes

This was absolutely one of the wildest games of this or any year. You know it’s a crazy time when there are two goals scored before the announcers can even look at the starting line-ups. Cristian Canozales racked up four goals (and might have gotten more if it wasn’t for a missed offside call). Announcers went so far as to call him the Colombian Mbappe and honestly…they don’t seem wrong.

News & Notes

March Madness Corner

A purple upset only you boys saw coming (from NY Times)

During this month there’s a special additional competition that’s impossible to ignore. Even if you only have time to watch one sporting event, you can’t escape March Madness and College Basketball.

Given that your grandpa was a college hoopster (in the 70s…at a tiny Minnesota school) it’s his favorite time of year, and we pass that on to you gladly. This year, in the time honored tradition, each boy (and momma) picked teams to win: Alex favored Tigers and Knights, Owen picked anyone with purple, and Kristina listened to you both. As a result, you are all doing better than the rest of the family.

Cookie, player of the month in our hearts

International Break upcoming

There will be fewer games than usual next week as most leagues take a break for international team matches. Mostly these are far flung friendlies that we’ll check in on if we’re so inclined, but there’s one special match. The US Men will play Grenada and their leader, our old friend, Regan Charles Cook. Cookie has been solid as an occasional starter and frequent sub in Belgium, so we’ll be hoping he can turn some more heads against the regional heavyweights (even if those regional heavyweights represent us).

An Overdue Addition

For a long time I’ve said that I don’t see why Major League Soccer looks only to Europe and South America for their big players. There are, I’ve reasoned, plenty of great players in Africa and Asia who could do just as well as the players from more traditional soccer nations. For proof, consider Bongokhule Hlongwane…and now his potential partner in Minnesota United’s attack South Korean Jeong Sang-Bin. (You may see his name written in another order, but as Koreans prefer to start with their family name, I’m going to respect that and repeat it here). At just 20 years old, he’s an exciting young addition to Minnesota and should offer a much needed goal scorer (knock on all the wood)

Player of the Week

This is another hard one, Michael Otou lifted Legon Cities out of the relegation scene. Cristian Canozales poured in the goals in one of the wildest games of the year. But we’re going to give it to someone who probably could have won recently, and just leave Michael and Cristian in the overdue camp for future awards. Miller Bolaños seems determined to stand above the pack in goal scoring. Luka Macjen and Juan Mera certainly haven’t made it easy for him, but if he continues to contribute all of the goals that Emelec gets, it will get a lot closer a lot faster than any of us anticipated.

Standings

We’re noticing some pretty stark separation here. Pubjab, Minnesota, and Emelec continue to dominate, but the middle of the table lags far, far behind them. Why? We have no earthly idea, so feel free to leave irrational conjectures in the comments area below!

TeamWDLPPGGFAGAA
Punjab–b11212.502.640.79
Minnesota2102,331.330.66
Emelec3012.251.500.75
Freiburg6481.221.331.78
Grenoble74101.190.951.19
Legon Cities3541.170.921.00
Alebrijes3451.081.671.58
Vozdovac2241.000.751.88
Ross County2360.821.091.18
Rosenborg0010.000.001.00
Montana–b000
Table Updated 3/22/22
b–Team is between seasons

What’s Next

Thursday, March 23rd

Friday, March 24th

Alebrijes de Oaxaca v. Atletico La Paz

Saturday, March 25th

Rosenborg v. Staebek (F)

Minnesota v. Vancouver (M)

Sunday, March 26th

Bayer Leverkusen v. Freiburg (F)

Great Olympics v. Legon Cities

Toulouse FC v. Grenoble Foot (F)

Monday, March 27th

Tuesday, March 28th

Cimmarones v. Alebrijes

Wednesday, March 29th